With just a little effort, you can adjust your thinking and take steps to. I take the smallest change in tone or facial expression as a sign they dont like me or are annoyed with me. Instead of going over something in your mind again and again, you can start to take the steps necessary to resolve the situation. You can even offer to do it with them, as a sign of moral support. Terms. It's tempting because it feels like you're doing something but you risk getting stuck in a loop of negative thoughts and anxiety, she says. 'I Want to Sleep But My Body Wont Let Me': Why Does This Happen? When I zone out, its when my mind plays out every possible and even some impossible situations that could happen during the days activities. , I get worried when theres an even slight change in the persons tone and start apologizing for things I mightve done wrong. Overthinking can be a hard habit to break. While this may influence where their products or services appear on our site, it in no way affects our ratings, which are based on thorough research, solid methodologies and expert advice. Studies show taking a 90-minute walk in a nature-filled environment can decrease ones inclination toward rumination[1]Bratman GN, Hamilton JP, Hahn KS, Daily GC, Gross James J. If you are busy yourself, seeing friends, playing sports or music, then you are much less likely to overthink. FEATURED PARTNER OFFER Partner Offers feature brands who paid Forbes Health to appear at the top of our list. Overthinking impairs the quality of your sleep too. Studies have shown that overthinking elevates your stress levels, reduces your creativity, clouds your judgment, and strips you of your power to make decisions. Making a list or plan is more action-oriented, and that can calm our ruminating brain a bit, too, says Dattilo. So, the best way to curb overthinking is. And that youre waiting in the wings should they ever need support, advice, etc. In doing so, you will reclaim your brainpower, energy, and time. Follow Now: Apple Podcasts / Spotify / Google Podcasts. "You're still in my thoughts. 5) Accept uncertainty. Many of these are caused by cognitive distortions, which are negative or distorted ways of thinking. You might send some of these text messages immediately after learning about a loss. To find out what others dont realize people are doing because theyre overthinking, Ask the same question(s) multiple times. This type of overthinking sets you up to worry about unrealistic worst-case scenarios. Her TEDx talk, "The Secret of Becoming Mentally Strong," is one of the most viewed talks of all time. Shed ask herself over and over what caused me to have this thought, what does it mean," what if I get stuck and become more and more anxious, or, I need to find a way to get better control of my mind." Privacy It often dreams up the very worst outcomes for any given scenario and this tends to intensify the problem of overthinking. The opposite approach is to disengage from the thought. Help them come up with a plan they can turn to in their most anxious moments. I think it comes across as an interrogation, or that I am questioning the person as an individual rather than just asking questions in general. To cope with that Ive tried to give myself the same choice and make the same decision. He/she sounds like a wonderful person.". I can take them at their word." At first, it may feel like you're lying to yourself, but I promise that after a while these mantras will start to sink into your spirit. While some anxious folks shut down, this person might actually be the one reaching out to you, possibly to vent about their stress or talk about whatevers weighing heavy on their mind. Did You Know Anxiety Can Enhance Our Relationships? Here are suggestions for what to say: 1. Ask the same question(s) multiple times. I dont like to make decisions without seriously thinking it over. The offers that appear in this table are from partnerships from which Verywell Mind receives compensation. Makes people feel weird and random, but probably not as weird as I feel having to say sorry without even knowing why. , I put off necessary things like medical appointments, because I overthink whether its important enough or not. Many of my clients have expressed frustration, even anguish, with their relentless experiences of self-imposed mental interrogation. Overthinking may be a symptom of a mental health issue, like depression or anxiety. Plus, thinking about all the things you could have done differently, second-guessing your decisions, and continuously imagining worst-case scenarios can be exhausting. Since thoughts can be focused on many different things, research has generally differentiated between "rumination" about the past and present, and "worry" about the future. When someone says something or acts in a way I don't like, I dwell on it. So its harder to fall into a deep slumber when your brain is busy overthinking everything.. Fortunately, there are several mental strength exercises you can do to change the channel in your brain from overthinking into a more healthy mindset. 1. Aiming thus at something else, they find happiness by the way. Research has found that a 10-minute meditation can be an effective way to stop intrusive thoughts and worry. Also, explore different types of overthinking, the effects on your mental health and relationships, and how to stop overthinking things in your life. The goal is to remind them of their own resilience and strength. Let your friend or loved one know that he or she is still in your thoughts even after a few weeks or months have passed. Talking in too much detail and then feeling embarrassed about how long Ive been talking for. , Asking for constant reassurance on matters that may not bother an ordinary person and also overexplaining things to people (as in giving too many details in an attempt to make sense). , Always asking for reassurance. This one serves as a gentle reminder that, even though it never feels like it in the moment, anxious feelings do eventually fade. If youre prone to overthinking, try the following strategies the next time you find yourself slipping down the slope of rumination. Dr. Spann is a founding team member and the former chief clinical officer of Hurdle, a digital health platform for people of color. If your overthinking focuses on your partner, you could say something like, "My partner loves me. 2023 BDG Media, Inc. All rights reserved. Even though excessive thinking might harm mental health, it may be controlled with the right methods. 4) Maintain a healthy social network of your own. A lot. I often ask myself "what if" questions. Overthinking can also take a serious toll on relationships. Practicing mindfulness means being present in the moment and noting what you're feeling. Its a repetitive cycle that can be tough to break. Post-Its on my fridge with the same information that is written on my wall calendar and desk calendar. , Take notes and write everything down. Whether your tendency of overthinking takes you into the past or focuses on the future, there are positive ways to reframe your thoughts and stress less. with more productive self-reflection and problem-solving. A brief distraction can give you a break. Healthy self-reflection is about learning. Feeling that close friends want nothing to do with me, or want me out of their life if I have not communicated with them in a while. Kevin M. Sometimes, I can be slow at work because I overthink how to do things the right way. Why Am I Having Racing Thoughts at Night? Other ways to connect with your body include moving to music or hitting the gym. "Thinking too much": A systematic review of a common idiom of distress. Overthinking and worrying are mental activities, so if they start to take hold, do something physical. Signs of overthinking include: Overthinking can happen for several reasons. When it comes to thinking about a problem, balance is the key Smith-Acua, says. Being withdrawn and quiet, getting so caught up in making sure I heard them right and making sure I dont say anything foolish that I barely say anything or include myself in social situations unless its close family (not extended, even). Rach M. Get really quiet because I dont want to say anything wrong. Destiny V. Questioning if someone is mad at me over and over. Anytime I think about calling for an appointment, I feel stressed. , Im indecisive. When he texts you something simple, like "hi" or "yo" What you tell yourself:. Maybe you keep thinking about all the things that could go wrong when you give your presentation next week, or youve wasted countless hours trying to decide what to wear to your upcoming job interview. Let me repeat that. Anytime I think about calling for an appointment, I feel stressed. Andrea G. Im indecisive. Also, if youre struggling with thoughts of self-harm of any kind, contact your doctor or therapist immediately, she adds. While the brain may offer numerous or near-constant thought suggestions, its ultimately up to us to decide if we accept them.. While this may influence where their products or services appear on our site, it in no way affects our ratings, which are based on thorough research, solid methodologies and expert advice. Overthinking, however, is thinking about everything you dont have control over, and then dwelling on how bad you feel about it. I use it to think about the possible upcoming situations that can happen in my planned day. This compensation comes from two main sources. Knowing what you value will help you build the most meaningful life possible. Learning how to reframe them in a more positive way can help relieve the tendency to overthink. I need to eat less." When I work too much, I can say, "I'm getting burned out. A 2013 study published in the Journal of Abnormal Psychology reports dwelling on your. You can find even more stories on our Home page. Learn what overthinking is, some signs you may be an overthinker, and a few reasons some people think too much. Generally, "overthinking" refers to the process of repetitive, unproductive thought. Also, because anxiety is so tiring and overwhelming, keep in mind that your partner, family member, or friend might not text back right away. 1. Im wondering if Im doing the best. On top of it, I struggle with OCD, too. , I jump to conclusions. It can be helpful to, therefore, not ask a direct question and instead just let them know that you are thinking about them and hoping they are OK, Potter says. Just remember you cant speed up the process or talk someone out of anxiety.